Monday, March 19, 2012

My Worst Fears: It's almost Friday

Seven days is a very short time to accept everything could be gone, completely re-navigate your relationship with a person you've spent over half your life with, learn how family court works, and accept that the most intimate aspects of your life are now public record. All the while appearing unaffected.....My worst fears realized. My husband at the time was prepared: calm, cool, collected, and supported by his family, my former therapist (ultimate betrayal), our oldest daughter and her boyfriend. There were very damaging affidavits and motions. You can say anything in a motion and the other person has to prove otherwise. This is what I mean by prepared. Right from the start my sociopath revealed abuse I had suffered as a child in great detail, he took events that really happened and exaggerated them to the level of a best selling novel or movie.  He also became extremely adept at something called projection. This is where a person takes their own feelings, thoughts and experiences and ascribes them to someone else. I was reading his documents saying to myself….. “but…..that was him….not me…he did that…” Life is so unfair sometimes.

Little did I know that childhood abuse is one reason a child can be taken from their mother. He rang every single custody bell he could; he was prepared and had been coached! Can you imagine sharing painful memories with your spouse only to see them amplified in a court document for so many people to analyze? Cruel beyond words. 

How could this religious powerhouse of a family very nearly gloat over destroying another human being? I can hardly wrap my brain around this.

I met with my attorney and went over the documents I needed to prepare to fight. I asked her, feeling so misunderstood and not fully comprehending the injustice of what was happening, “Doesn’t anyone see that this all came after I filed an Emergency Protective Order? Isn’t it obvious this is retaliation?” All she said is “I do.” If not for her I would not have my son today.
The sociopath I had married had said to me over and over: “If you ever mention domestic violence, if you ever try to leave, I will take everything from you, your children, your public respect, and it will be easy.” HE WAS RIGHT AND HIS THREATS WERE REAL.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thank you for your comment. Positive feedback and helping those that have experienced the same tragedies are what keeps me going.