Monday, May 30, 2016

Entitlements and Demands

This may seem very harsh but I am fed up. After years of my daughters having control they are out of it. They are bordering on harrassment. Contact is out of the question. Really? Peter could be on the other line....contempt of court.  Peter and both of you are child abusers. Come clean. Peter is not able to do the simplest in response to his abuse and now daughters you see there is no control anymore. So....you have decided to bombard me and harass my phone line. Go away. Please. You have hurt us all enough. Please go away. 

Sunday, May 1, 2016

The Story of a Little Boy: The Living Death

A little 6 year old boy has two sisters that are so much older they are like second moms….a horrible unnecessarily hostile and highly litigated divorce unfolds and those sisters chose only to interact with their brother dependent upon court ordered communication with their dad, who one calls Peter instead of dad. 

In an age where communication is so easy people can even accidentally communicate, these sisters elected to not communicate with their little brother independently…the little boy learned to miss his sisters. You see their hate for their mother was much stronger than their love for their little brother, who looked on them like heroes and stars. He had been to so many ballet and singing lessons and his sisters so talented, why wouldn’t he think the world of them? His mother nearly always taking the girls to lessons and her wanting to be with her little boy as much as possible brought him as well. They watched them together…. at ballet studios, school musicals, music lessons…

There were short talks about visiting them, not them coming to him, not them asking about his life, what he wanted, what mattered to him…only anticipation of visiting them on their terms. Anticipation…..oh how he looked forward to that spring break…so many plans…so much excitement. The little brother and the mother went to the store and bought a musical note pin for the opera singer, a peacock pin for the dancer (because she was so fashionable) a rock that said “love,” a rock that said “faith,” candles, bunnies for Easter, cards, school pictures (a larger order so everyone could have a picture); THE LITTLE BOY PICKED EVERYTHING OUT HIMSELF AND WAS SO EXCITED TO SEE HIS BIG SISTERS.

[Please see the post “The family that stole Easter” for details of the event.]

Where were they? He called their phones, he left messages where he could barely talk he was crying so hard, asking where his dad was…was he dead? He called, the mother called, emailed, the mother put messages out on Facebook….NO ONE ANSWERED. NO ONE ANSWERED. NO ONE EXPLAINED. NO ONE APOLOGIZED. There were so many messages; there was/is no possible way his sisters did not know about this tragic event. NO WAY.

He has no control, they won’t answer; they won’t talk to him. They left him. This little boy has no control over when or even if he will ever see his sisters again. He had two sisters…now he does not…that's all he understands...he's just a little boy...


THE LITTLE BOY LEARNS ABOUT LIVING DEATH….

Years later they call the mother demanding to talk to the little boy right then....hateful, angry, with no desire to understand their little brother. Only wanting to talk to him because for some reason at this point in time they have decided they now want to communicate, perhaps independently, perhaps not. This is what THEY want and they WANT IT RIGHT NOW. The big sisters do not understand how the little boy has grieved and to pass the phone would diminish his years of grief. No, big sisters, little brother needs so much more than a flippant phone conversation that only makes you feel better and likely him only being abandoned once again.

This is a very sad story.